"I love you more than the tongue can tell..."

Declan and I headed to Plymouth Harbour today to pick up Grandmama. Plymouth Harbour is an amazing program that is essentially a daycare for the elderly and individuals with Alzheimer's Disease. My grandmother used to run this program and now she is a participant. I had gone with Grandmama to help with Plymouth Harbour almost 14 years ago and have not been there since. We got there early because I was sure that she would want to show off her great grandson...and she did. We interrupted a game of Bingo and played what was left of the game with Grandmama and her friends. My grandmother was SO excited to see us...her face when we surprised her was priceless. It was the happiest I had seen her in a very long time. As I looked around the room while holding my almost 1 year old son, I was filled with mixed emotions and very disturbed with the "circle of life." I was feeling this way because in a matter of hours I knew my grandmother would be moving into an assisted living home.

We went on an outing to Toy's R Us where she could push Declan around and buy him a bday gift and then we headed to Kroger to buy her favorite ice cream...next stop...THE HOME. My parents, my aunts, and my uncle had busted their butts all day to get Gma's new "home" set up. We pulled up and she knew where we were because my mom and aunt had taken her by to see it. "Why are we here?" "I am not ready, Stefani," she pleads to me with tears in her eyes. Thank God for Declan! He started babbling and laughing and reaching for his great grandmother which took her mind off of everything. My mom met us out in the parking lot and we all walked in together. I don't think it was all registering with her. Bottom line is that she has moderate Alzheimer's Disease and cannot live alone anymore. This was going to be her new home. She needs safety and 24 hour care.

We walked in and the staff was wonderful! We showed Grandmama her new room which was set up perfectly by my, parents, aunts, and uncle. Honestly...it felt like home. Declan was exhausted, but it was like he knew he had to be a trooper and that we weren't leaving anytime soon. We all had dinner together in a room that they set up just for us. Grandmama was still in denial that she was staying there. Declan made his way out to where everyone else was dining and started flirting with all of the ladies...especially the ones that had wheels :-) I explained to them that my Gmama was the new kid on the block and to be very sweet to her.

As we walked back to my Gma's room she was nervous and sad. I told her it was okay to be sad, but that she had to be safe and that this was the best decision. Again...Declan was reaching for her and smiling at her making her feel better. How do kids know? Crazy!

We made sure she was safely in her room and had her cat with her before we left. I am not even going to lie a little bit. I cried the whole way home. I know she is safe and being taken care of and that this is the BEST decision for her, but it does not make it any easier. You may think that my grandmother and I are very close...not so much. She can be mean as a snake and definitely prefers my sister and my cousins over me, but none of that matters. I just want her to feel safe, be happy, have friends, and get the care that she needs...and she will get all of that now in her new home.

Thank God for a strong family who sticks together and loves one another unconditionally. Please say a prayer for my grandmother and our family as we make this transition together.

Grandmama's phrases that make me smile :-)

"I love you more than the tongue can tell"

"Yee Gods!"

"Happiness"

"Patience is a virtue, virtue is a grace. Put them both together and get a smiling face."

"God only knows what a dog will do...."